


I Thought of You

by arrafrost



Series: Death Is Calling [2]
Category: Deadpool (Comics), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, F/M, Flashbacks, M/M, Post The Break Up, Spideypool - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-13
Updated: 2013-10-13
Packaged: 2017-12-29 08:37:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1003292
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arrafrost/pseuds/arrafrost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Someone asked me to write a sequel to my spideypool break up fic "You'll Think of Me" where Wade comes back...</p><p>Be careful what you wish for.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Thought of You

_“Hey baby boy.”_

Peter shot up in his bed, covers falling onto his lap as his chest heaved. His body was trembling, his breathing was panicked, and he felt like he was going to throw up.

It had been weeks since he’d last thought of Wade… or at least since he’d dreamt about him so vividly.

He gripped his sheets in his sweaty hands, tugging at them as he clenched his jaw. It felt like he was right there… whispering to Peter in his sleep how he used to when they were together. Waking him up from his sleep with lips teasing his ear…

Peter sucked in a sharp breath at the prickling feeling behind his eyes, blinking rapidly in the darkness of his bedroom.

“You’re jumpy today.”

Peter physically jumped that time, hands moving behind him to stick to the wall and preparing him to climb up it until his eyes locked on the silhouette across the room, sitting in his desk chair.

“Wade…” He whispered, the word foreign on his lips. He didn’t speak about him anymore… didn’t have the energy to and people were probably sick of hearing about Peter’s heartbreak from the man they all warned him about anyway.

Deadpool gave him a little wave of his hand and as Peter’s eyes adjusted to the low level lighting, only the city lights flooding into his window, he noticed that Wade’s costume was ripped. There were a few good tears in some places, bullet holes in others, no blood though. Which meant he’d come here from the battle, had enough time to heal himself but didn’t go somewhere to get a new costume.

Peter swallowed. Just like old times.

Immediately he shut his eyes, feeling his breathing speed up even more which he didn’t think was possible unless he was having a heart attack. He clenched his face, willing this dream to go away. Because that’s what it was. That’s all it could be. A terrible dream where they were back to normal. Where Wade had never left him and was coming back from a night of fighting to see Peter, get him to mend his costume and then… Peter shook his head, refusing to think about this anymore.

The bed dipped. Physically, literally dipped from the weight of another human being that definitely existed.

His eyes flashed open just in time to see Wade’s hand inches from his face… like he was going to caress his cheek and make it all better.

Peter flinched, moving his entire body to press back against the wall. He tried to will himself to glare at Wade, to hate him, but he was still shaking and when he spoke his voice was low and timid. “What are you doing here?”

Wade’s head tilted, still masked though, not a single tear to the front of his mask… typical. He seemed confused but he lowered the hand that Peter rejected. “Came to see you.”

“Why?” Peter spat out, panicked voice on the verge of tears. “Why would you think that’s okay?”

“Hey,” Wade’s tone was soothing, calm, comforting… but Peter managed to keep a wary eye on the hand that moved closer to him. The mercenary’s hand rested on Peter’s knee, Peter jumped at the touch but he made no attempt to move. His hand, even through the fabric, was warm. “I thought you’d be alright now.”

Peter narrowed his eyes, forcing him to look up from Wade’s hand on his knee to stare the merc in the eye… sections of his mask.

“What?” His voice was sharp in the quiet of the room, he could feel the anger building in his stomach.

“You were mad at me… really pissed if I recall,” Wade continued and Peter ground his teeth together. Pissed didn’t cover what Peter had felt at the time. “So I gave you time to chill out.”

“It’s been two  _months_. Wade.”

“Yeah, plenty of time.”

Peter laughed, venom practically dripping from his lips. “Plenty of time?” He jostled his knee, forcing Wade’s hand off his body. “For what? For me to  _forgive you?_ For me to stop being pissed off that you betrayed everything we had? Is that what you thought?”

“Um… yeah?” Wade asked innocently and Peter wanted to punch him hard enough to bleed.

“You fucking cheated on me! During the  _entirety_ of our relationship and then you left me for her! You want to kill yourself to be with her, Wade! What the fuck am I supposed to do to compete with that?”

 To that, Wade pulled off his mask and Peter wanted to look away. It was easier if he was talking to Deadpool, it was easier if he was talking to a mask. But now it was Wade… Wade with his scars, with those deep set blue eyes, with lips he’d kissed a hundred times, and Peter wanted to touch him. To feel his uneven skin beneath his fingertips. He wanted this back, the smell of Wade, the feel of him, the heat of his body pressing against his own.

Peter bit back a sob as he glanced up at the ceiling, refusing to look Wade in the eye.

“I don’t want you to compete with her, Peter. You’re different. You give me different things.”

Peter laughed bitterly, fingers flexing against the wall he was still sticking to. He was so tempted to climb the rest of the way up the wall and out the window. Fling himself down the street and avoid Wade all together but he would probably be there, in his bedroom, when he returned and that wasn’t something Peter could handle.

“You didn’t just leave for her, Wade. I told you to get out. To never come back. I said I never wanted to see you again.”

“You didn’t mean it,” Wade said confidently and Peter closed his eyes… because in the smallest way, he was right. At the time Peter was so angry he could have put Deadpool through the wall. But he loved him.

Then Wade was there. In his space. Moving closer to him until Peter could feel the heat of his body next to his own. Peter stretched his neck away from Wade’s face that was inching closer, he could feel his breath on his skin… so familiar but wrong.

Wade’s dry lips pressed against his neck, kissing his way up Peter’s throat and Peter tilted his head away from Wade’s touch but it was too much. Soon his lips were moving along his jaw, up his cheek before settling over his lips and Peter tried to keep still, had his lips in an unmoving straight line… but the longer Wade kissed him, the longer he could smell Wade all around him, the harder it was to resist.

Peter kissed him back, desperate and hard. Their mouths open and it was fast and wet and became a battle of who wanted the other more. Of who missed this the most, of who wanted it back.

Wade’s hand came up to cradle the back of Peter’s head and deepened the kiss with a tilt of the boy’s head. They were panting and Peter was moaning at the taste of him. It was everything he needed.  

“Fuck,” Peter breathed into Wade’s mouth when he pulled back for air. Wade’s lips immediately relocated to the vigilante’s neck, sucking a bruise onto his pulse. Peter keened, arching his body into Wade.

“I knew you missed me,” Wade whispered, his voice hot and thick in Peter’s ear.

Peter blinked through the fog, pulling back slightly. “I did…” He admitted, cursing himself for it until he continued, “Did you miss me?”

“Of course I did, baby boy.”

“But not enough to leave her?” Peter choked out.

Wade pulled back, looking Peter in the eye, “I told you, you needed time to cool off.”

“Cool off?” Peter shook his head, looking anywhere but the mercenary. “Fuck Wade you don’t even understand what you did. You don’t know how much you hurt me.”

“I’m sorry, I’ll make it better,” Wade breathed, lips pressing against his neck again to leave wet kisses over his collarbone.

“Stop…” Peter whispered.

Wade didn’t. But when his lips hovered over Peter’s, the boy pulled away.

“Don’t.” He shook his head as Wade stared into his eyes. “Don’t do this to me again. You’re just going to use me up and leave me here. You left me broken with no one to fix me and you expect to come back into my life like nothing happened?”

Peter was livid, he could feel the anger bubbling inside of him and he wasn’t going to let Wade do this. “I loved you, Wade. I fucking  _loved you_. Despite what anyone said about you! I cared about you even though you did things I didn’t approve of, even though you came to me covered in other people’s blood sometimes. I loved you  _so fucking much._ Do you understand that?”

Wade nodded, and that’s all Peter let him do before he continued.

“And you threw that away. You tossed me to the side all because you want to die. You want to put yourself out of your misery because there’s nothing here for you right? Nothing worth living for… not even me. Because it’s all about her! It’s all about being with Death, someone… some _thing_  you can never have. Even when you had me, you weren’t happy and you didn’t care if you hurt me when you left. That’s why you need to go.”

“Peter, calm down-“

“I want you to leave.”

“You love me.”

“Maybe,” Peter shrugged, because maybe that was true… maybe he still did love Wade… but that wasn’t enough. “But I can’t have you in my life. I don’t want you in my life. Not when you’re with her. Not when you did that to me.”

“You don’t understand,” Wade spoke softly, almost apologetically as he sat back on the bed, moving out of Peter’s space.

“Maybe not,” Peter agreed. Because he didn’t understand why Wade would chose some entity that he couldn’t have over someone who was there for him all the time, no matter what, someone who loved him as unconditionally as Peter had. “Maybe I never will and maybe I’ll never want to. You hurt me, Wade, and until you can understand that… I don’t want to see you again.”

“I missed you…” Wade looked up at him, eyes pleading and that killed him. Peter’s chest ached because all he wanted to do was lean forward, cup Wade’s face in his palms and kiss everything away. He wanted to comfort Wade and wanted to find comfort in him because he wished his life was a cheesy romantic comedy where they could forgive each other and go back to the way things were. But it wasn’t. Peter’s hands remained stuck to the wall.

“I missed you, too.” Peter nodded sadly. “I miss what we had… but we can’t have that back.”

Wade opened his mouth but Peter shook his head.

“Please, just go Wade.”

They stared at each other for the longest time until Wade reached out on the bed and grabbed his mask. He tugged it back on, eyes fixed on Peter’s until the fabric covered his face, and he stood up. Peter was shaking again, fingers trembling with the desire to reach out and pull him back. He wanted to grab his arm and stop him from stepping out onto the windowsill. Wanted to shoot a web and haul him back to bed.

But Peter watched as Deadpool climbed out his window, taking one last moment to glance at Peter through the mask, before he descended down the rope or cord attached to the grappling hook clinging to his windowsill.

Moments later the grappling hook was dislodged and Wade was gone.

Peter rocked his head back against the wall and exhaled loudly, gripping the wall tightly. It took him at least an hour to finally let go of the wall and crawl back into his bed.

He wasn’t sure if the sheets still smelled like Wade from the moment of contact or if he was imagining it. Either way, it made it easier to hold the pillow to his chest and bury his face into it.

When he woke up his pillow was wet, daylight was streaming in through his window, and there was no sign of Wade. He knew he’d made the right decision, but it didn’t make this morning feel anything like a victory.

**Author's Note:**

> More fics on [my tumblr](http://arrafrost.tumblr.com) (I update more regularly there)
> 
> This is not an on-going series please do not ask for more. This was a sequel to a oneshot fic and that is all.


End file.
